"So tonight, 12 leggy blondes walked up to me in a Hollywood bar. I chose the best three."
"Walking around Lake Como. Four women on my arm. None of them wants Pitt."
"Feeling pissed that Michael Douglas got Matt Damon to kiss him before he kissed me."
No, I am not fantasizing about my life. I am fantasizing about George Clooney's tweets. If he ever chose to emit any, that is.
Sadly for humanity, this is unlikely to ever happen. Clooney has expounded on his revulsion toward Twitter.